Self-Care is Healthcare

By Ulysses Burley III
CRS Board of Directors
Founder of UBtheCURE LLC

Matthew 14:22-32

22 Immediately he made the disciples get into the boat and go on ahead to the other side, while he dismissed the crowds. 23 And after he had dismissed the crowds, he went up the mountain by himself to pray. When evening came, he was there alone, 24 but by this time the boat, battered by the waves, was far from the land, for the wind was against them. 25 And early in the morning he came walking toward them on the sea. 26 But when the disciples saw him walking on the sea, they were terrified, saying, "It is a ghost!" And they cried out in fear. 27 But immediately Jesus spoke to them and said, "Take heart, it is I; do not be afraid." 28 Peter answered him, "Lord, if it is you, command me to come to you on the water." 29 He said, "Come." So Peter got out of the boat, started walking on the water, and came toward Jesus. 30 But when he noticed the strong wind, he became frightened, and beginning to sink, he cried out, "Lord, save me!" 31 Jesus immediately reached out his hand and caught him, saying to him, "You of little faith, why did you doubt?" 32 When they got into the boat, the wind ceased. 33 And those in the boat worshiped him, saying, "Truly you are the Son of God."

At least once in your life you've probably undergone a personality assessment -- whether it was Myers Briggs, or the Enneagram or DISC -- and it likely happened on the job, or at school or even at church if you've served in any capacity. Somewhere along the way psychologists determined that understanding your personality type was a good first step in discerning your leadership capabilities. Beginning with whether you are an extrovert or an introvert.

Typically, introverts tend to enjoy more time to themselves, are very aware of their internal thoughts and recharge more in solitude. Extroverts, on the other hand, are often more outspoken, outgoing and draw their energy from being around other people. It's a lot more complex than this, but comprehending these basic distinctions goes a long way in informing how we show up in the world.

If I had to guess, I’d say that Jesus was an introvert -- contemplative and self-aware -- drawing his energy from the quietude and solitude of the wilderness after consistently being exerted by the crowds. The Gospel of Matthew marks the beginning of Jesus' public ministry -- teaching, preaching, healing and performing miracles throughout the Holy Land. As news of the works performed by the Messiah grew, so did the crowds. In fact, there are 50 separate references to "the crowds" in the Gospel of Matthew.

But, as the crowds grew, Jesus was very intentional about creating the space that he needed to be successful in the public square. For example, after learning of the beheading of John the Baptist, Matthew 14:13 says that Jesus withdrew from there in a boat to a deserted place by himself. Likewise, after feeding the five thousand, "Immediately he made the disciples get into the boat and go on ahead to the other side, while he dismissed the crowds. And after he had dismissed the crowds, he went up the mountain by himself to pray…alone."

There's this reoccurring theme of Jesus taking rest, by himself, right before he has to engage the crowds or perform a miracle, because Jesus understands his personality traits and knows what he needs in order to be productive. More than that, Jesus exemplifies that even the most powerful being to ever walk across land and water needs to exercise self-care.

Regardless of whether you thrive in crowds or in quietude - at some point we all need rest. We all need to practice self-care to be our best selves. Self-care evangelist Katie Reed says, “Self-care is giving the world the best of you, instead of what’s left of you.”

In a society where clichés like “no days off” and “I’ll rest when I’m dead” are glorified and anything less than full speed is failure, it’s easy to get caught up in the pressure to stay plugged in or logged on. Sooner or later, however, that mindsight will most certainly result in burnout, especially with the weightiness of today’s war-torn, pandemic-riddled world. When you couple our natural need for rest with Zoom, pandemic and compassion fatigue, the example of Jesus Christ in the crowd is all the more relevant.

Establishing boundaries and enforcing them becomes an act of self-care -- a revolutionary act. As a health professional I've dedicated my life to caring for others. I love caring and sharing and speaking and teaching. I feel alive when I'm in front of hundreds, or even thousands, pouring my heart out. But everything that's poured out must be filled back up. Often times the source of my filling-up is in the peace of privacy and my own personhood.

Just as Jesus took refuge in the quiet places so to must we. Jesus gives us permission to establish boundaries and enforce them. That permission, in and of itself, is life giving. For me it’s liberating, because the healthcare that I deliver is only as good as the self-care I give myself. Self-care is the most affordable healthcare available. The way you treat yourself is a direct reflection of how you’ll treat others, and it couldn't be more evident than in the public ministry of Jesus.

So, take care. Understand what you need to be whole and exercise your right to self-care. If you know you struggle with holding yourself accountable, surround yourself with people who know how to get you to sit down, because Jesus did that too. In between healing the sick and feeding the multitude, the disciples remarked to Jesus that they were in the middle of nowhere and it was getting late so He needed to send the crowds away. While Jesus didn't listen that time, he would go on to take rest alone up the mountainside immediately following the miracle — giving him the strength he needed to continue to perform at a high level and do things like walk on water!

When we commit to the level of self-care that we desire and require, it gives us the ability to do things we didn't know we were capable of. So be kind to yourself. Be gentle with each other, and take advantage of the wilderness moments this Lenten season to do things for yourself that you haven't been able to make space for in a long time. You might find that a little rest and relaxation will leave you feeling like you can walk on water.

As Jesus extends his hand to Peter to get out of the boat with confidence, so is He extending an invitation to us to go up to the mountainside — alone — so that when we come down, we too will possess the power to make miracles happen.

Ulysses Burley III
CRS Board of Directors
Founder of UBtheCURE LLC

Read more Lenten Devotions.